I think it was August 1997.
I was wandering through the streets of Triplicane, looking for a room. That was when I happened to run into my college senior, Chidambara Bharathi.
“There is a room available in a mansion. You can share it with a young man from Thiruvannamalai whom I know,” he said.
It was in that room on the third floor that I saw you for the first time.
Neither of us could have imagined that the friendship which began then would continue for twenty-nine years.
Among all the people I had met until then, you were different. You were also someone whose wavelength matched mine.
Like me, you were a responsible young man. You also shared my interest in reading books.
You would wear a white sleeveless vest and a veshti tied down to your ankles. Sometimes, you would wear trousers.
You lived simply, with the detached attitude that “if one dies today, the funeral rites will be tomorrow.”
Although you ate only in moderation, you believed that whatever you ate had to be of the highest quality and full of flavor.
I would eat at one of the many inexpensive messes nearby—Amma Mess, Thatha Mess, or somewhere similar.
But you would say, “Two idlis, one vada, and a strong cup of coffee at Saravana Bhavan—nothing could be more divine!”
I would wonder, “What is so divine about an idli?”
I was also amazed that idli and vada alone could satisfy you. At that young age, they would not have filled even a quarter of my stomach.
You loved Carnatic music. You enjoyed coffee—preferably strong.
A strict vegetarian!
You had a deep interest in the Ramayana and the Mahabharata.
Seeing all this, I sometimes wondered whether you might have been born a Brahmin in a previous life.
You were an ardent admirer of the Writer Balakumaran.
Just as I frequently quote Charlie Munger, you would quote Rama, Lakshman, Bharatan, etc.
Whenever there was a debate, you would begin:
“This reminds me of something Rama once did…”
Then you would quote an example from the Ramayana or the Mahabharata and try to win the argument.
In all the rooms where I had previously stayed, no one ever bought fruit. But you would bring home a papaya, patiently cut it, and say, “Here, have some.”
You enjoyed solitude.
When I asked, “Where have you been? I haven’t seen you around,”
you would reply, “I went to the beach.”
You were naturally mischievous and playful.
You would ask questions for which you already know the answers just to see how I would respond.
Whatever the problem, whenever I spoke to you about it, you would offer a good solution.
A great adviser and guide!
Even at that age, you possessed a maturity, composure, and dignified presence far beyond your years.
In these twenty-nine years, your core nature has not changed at all.
Once, while we were in the room, you asked me:
“Hey, why do you fight with everyone?”
That one small observation—or criticism—made me aware of myself.
I was someone who expressed my opinions firmly, forcefully, and intensely. Combined with my stubbornness, this made it very easy for me to get into arguments. What you said gave me a new awareness of my own nature.
These days, I have learned to be finesse when dealing with people. Or I simply avoid situations that are likely to turn into arguments.
When we shared the room, you too would express your views with great intensity, conviction, and force. Now, like me, you have become gentler. You avoid incompatible or divisive discussions.
At that age, very few young men would have been so close to their fathers. But you shared a deep bond of love and affection with your father.
You often spoke about him.
Before doing anything, you would calmly and patiently examine the advantages and disadvantages and only then make a decision.
You would never rush into anything recklessly.
Patience and responsibility came naturally to you.
You were never careless. You paid attention even to the smallest details.
Attention to detail!
Some children cause their parents so much anguish that the parents wonder, “Why did we ever have this child?”
But self-discipline and self-control came naturally to you.
You were a humble, simple, compassionate son who respected and listened to his parents.
You believed that a sense of justice and moral integrity were among the most important qualities in a person’s life.
You are energetic, persistent, self-confident, knowledgeable, and, beyond mere intelligence, exceptionally wise and practical. Your parents must feel immensely happy and proud to have a son like you.
Even if parents had performed years of penance asking for a son, they might not have received one like you.
Your parents are truly fortunate.
People who meet Rajinikanth and speak with him often return deeply impressed and begin imitating the way he talks.
In the same way, you easily impress everyone you meet.
An extremely impressive personality!
No one who has known you would ever say, “I don’t like him.”
Your tolerance, flexibility, willingness to compromise, and generosity make you naturally likable.
The only problem is this:
Even if a beautiful woman were impressed by you, walked up to you, and said,
“Hello, handsome! Please come to my place for dinner tonight,”
you would probably reply:
“Oh no! I’m on a salad diet right now. Maybe some other day.”
To explain the reason in your own style:
“Rama’s arrow never misses its target because his attention is focused entirely on the target.”
Some people create tension and restlessness merely by being present.
But when one spends time with you or talks to you, one feels peaceful and reassured.
A calming presence!
People like me think about all the inconveniences and obstacles that may arise while travelling.
But you are a lover of travel who simply says, “We’ll deal with all that when it comes,” picks up your bag, and leaves.
Even though I grew up surrounded by my brother’s and sister’s children, I would always think, “What is there to talk to children about?” I would remain absorbed in my own private world. I am still like that.
But you have an extraordinary love for children.
You speak to them with affection, tenderness, and warmth, calling them “Raja” and “Kanna.”
You have a natural ability to explain things in a way that helps others understand.
Because you are also patient, teaching has always been a profession well suited to you.
Even when you were in India, you worked mainly in computer-coaching institutions.
Only a few people can perform every role in life as beautifully as you do—a good son, a good father, a good husband, and a good friend.
You are also a man of refined tastes!
You never do anything merely as a duty or burden.
Whether eating, cooking, listening to music, reading, or learning, you do it with enjoyment, involvement, and genuine appreciation.
When some people cook, the taste differs every time.
But you cook like an experienced chef, taking great care to add every ingredient in exactly the right proportion.
The taste remains consistent every single time.
You possess a remarkable natural resilience—the ability to recover from difficult circumstances.
The reason is that you look at everything positively and believe that “whatever happens, happens for the good.”
That is also why you are always smiling, cheerful, and happy.
Extreme optimism!
When you read the Thirukkural, you examine it from many different perspectives and offer numerous interpretations.
You should select a few of your favorite couplets and write your own explanations for them.
It is my great fortune that you became not only a dear friend but also an intellectual companion.
May you continue to live for many, many years with the same smiling face—happy, healthy, and full of life.
With love,
Your Roommate
